This child was surely going through something with which she was unable to cope. I can understand the teacher being upset with the child and I commend the teacher for controlling her reaction. The problem I have with this description is not knowing the context - what occurred prior to the incident, how old the child is, what ticked off the screaming, has it happened before, what is the situation at home for this child, etc. The behavior of the child is unacceptable but how we deal with it would depend on what precipitated it and what we know about this child as a whole. Is there some adjustment in the classroom or how adults interact with this child on a daily basis that can be made that would ward off this type of reaction from the child?
I agree that calling the parent and unloading on the mother or father or both might lead to delayed punishment by the parents, thus dealing with the incident at a time when it would no longer appear connected to the behavior that occurred during naptime. I think the director, if she did not already do it, should have removed the child from the room and sat her down in a quiet environment, which will allow her to calm down. Once the child has calmed down, I would try to have a calm conversation with the child about how throwing an object at the teacher impacted the teacher and is unacceptable.
Before I was a director and my children were attending a cooperative nursery school, the director would say to children when they exhibited out of control behavior that her job was to keep everyone safe and, therefore, she could not allow the child (whoever the child was) to hurt anyone. Most of the time, the children understood this and stopped the behavior.
At the end of the day, when the child is picked up might be the time to speak with the parent(s) about how upset the child was and that she displayed inappropriate behavior. I would then want to assure the parent that the center dealt with it but that we want to understand if there is something going on that led to the child's extreme temper tantrum or find out how they deal with her behavior when it spirals out of control.
The problem with all of this advice from me and others is that we do not know how old this child is and, therefore, we do not know what would be a developmentally appropriate way to resolve the whole incident where we turn it into a learning moment for the child.
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Nora Krieger
Associate Professor Emerita/ Chair NJEEPRE
Bloomfield College/ New Jersey Educators Exploring the Practices of Reggio Emilia
Highland Park NJ
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Original Message:
Sent: 08-11-2018 10:26 AM
From: Daisy Barges
Subject: What should have been done the
One of the students at the day care center had been having a temper tantrum during naptime. She would scream, holler and hit the other children. The employees managed to calm her down The student then picked up a small and hit one of the teachers as she was passing by. The teacher raised her hand , but didn't hi the child. Instead, she went outside, understandably very upset. She texted her mother to tell what happened. Meanwhile the director tells the child to lie down and be still if she wasn't going to nap. The employee asked the director was she going to call the child's parent. The director's reply was so nonchalant, the employee said she was leaving for the day. What should the director have done? Was the employee wrong for leaving?
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Daisy Barges
Baton Rouge LA
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