Bullying in ECE is so interesting isn't it? On the one hand- kids are experimenting with everything and behaviors that would clearly be considered bullying in the later grades, are often innocent mistakes at age 3 or 4. On the other hand, bullying behavior is a habit, and kids who get stuck in the rut of bullying past age 8 or so are at risk for some pretty negative outcomes (as are kids who are frequent targets of bullying behavior). And when hurtful behavior gets reinforced- because the child gets what he or she wants, or gets attention or a strong reaction (including laughter)- kids often repeat it. When we add to this the fact that we are not seeing a lot of what we might call pre-bullying because kids take most of their exploration of societal biases out of sight and earshot of adults it becomes clear that we need to be thinking about bullying in early childhood. I could go on and on about this - the research in this area is fascinating- but I think there are three main points.
1.
Supportive intervention every time. When children do anything that is hurtful to other children or reflects societal biases, they need our help to figure out another way to do things. Anytime we decide to ignore the behavior because we are busy or don't know just how to address it, we risk kids getting stuck in the habit of doing things that hurt other people.
2.
Stretch empathy across differences. Children are born with empathy. Babies are so empathetic that they often know what adults are feeling before we know ourselves. But if they don't get help to stretch that empathy to include people who are different from them, then the empathy can make them more biased, rather than less. So we need to be having lots of interesting, enthusiastic conversations about all sorts of similarities and differences.
3.
Help kids learn to understand and reject stereotypes. Pre-schoolers are tremendously vulnerable to stereotypes because they are primed to categorize things and stereotypes are a form of categorization. They are exposed to them all over their daily lives. If we aren't talking about stereotypes, the only way children can figure them out is to experiment with them - usually where we can't see or hear them. After about age 8 stereotypes become much harder to eliminate- so the ECE years are an important time to address them.
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[Meg] [Thomas]
[Early childhood program manager]
[AMAZE]
[St Paul ] [MN]
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Original Message:
Sent: 06-21-2017 06:45 AM
From: Catherine Roach
Subject: Bullying
I don't think preschoolers are capable of being bullies. Most of their behavior is imitation, experimentation, and exploration. They imitate others' behaviors-so if they see older children behaving like bullies they might try it to see if it works. They are continually trying to figure out what is acceptable and what is not. They are also figuring out what works and what doesn't when they want something, as well as exploring their effect on others-such as what happens when I hit? Do I get what I want? Do I make someone cry? What happens when I hug? Can I make someone happy? I don't think they have enough life experience to be labeled a bully. That being said, I do believe that preschool behaviors/habits can lead to bullying, so it needs to be handled properly so it doesn't lead to it.
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Catherine Roach
Milwaukee WI
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Original Message:
Sent: 06-20-2017 10:18 PM
From: Ludmila Battista
Subject: Bullying
I'm interested in your comment "there are no bullies in preschool." Why do you say that? Do you think children are too young at that age to be affected by bullying? I could see how young children could be intimidated by others or made to feel inferior or even frightened....wouldn't this constitute bullying behavior?
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Ludmila Battista
Flanders NJ
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Original Message:
Sent: 06-20-2017 10:41 AM
From: Amanda Lloyd
Subject: Bullying
There are no bullies in preschool, but there are warning signs that will lead to a child becoming a bully later in life if no one intervenes and provides the necessary help. Check out this PSA video from Conscious Discipline, "How to Make a Bully":
Conscious Discipline Videos - Conscious DisciplineThere are also videos explaining the critical interventions necessary to help children at each stage of development, as well as a PDF of the research that is referenced in the video.
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Mandy Lloyd, Conscious Discipline Certified Instructor
Annandale VA
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Original Message:
Sent: 06-18-2017 08:38 PM
From: Robert Gundling
Subject: Bullying
Recently, I was asked if I thought 4 and 5 year old children could be bullies. I am interested to know how others would respond to this question.
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Robert Gundling, Ed.D.
President
Sense of Wonder, LLC
Alexandria VA
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