Synchronicity and attunement are two similar words currently being used in child development research. Synchronicity has been used to described being in touch with a person's readiness to add to their knowledge, and attunement describes being in touch with a person's, especially an infant's, immediate needs. Not being in touch with an infant's needs including readiness to learn has been called invasive by one research team.
Researchers found that synchronistic mothers of infants had developed the regulation of emotion and impulsivity in their child by the age of three when mothers with behaviors called invasive had not. The regulation of emotion and impulsivity is crucial for the successful development of social skills. That means early childhood educators must pay attention to this information.
For example, consider teaching a child to wait in a line to go somewhere. The first issues needs to be questioning if they are ready to do this. We can assume they are not ready if they are pushing others or getting out of line, or otherwise resistant to the task. Brain science has taught us that what the child hasn't learned is the problem, not that he is being obstinate.
The next question is what is the child ready to learn that will led to knowing how to stand in line? For me, the answer to the question is delayed gratification. In terms of a famous experiment, the child needs to have more pleasure emotions of anticipation of the second marshmallow if she can wait ten minutes than the pleasure emotions she has for eating the marshmallow right away. There are terrible consequences in adulthood for children who don't learn this task.
The example can go many ways at this point, but a simple and convenient one is to make standing in line a brief experience that is easily successful and rewarded when accomplished. This may mean that short lines, even with just two or three children, might be used for practice. If this approach discovers what the child is read to learn, we have been synchronistic and attuned. When we succeed at this task, we have been significantly helpful with the progress of a child's life.
Anna, thank you for your response to my post on synchronisity and attunement. You seem to clearly understand its importance for having effective relationships with children and adults. I don't know of any book that would help you develop these ideas. I have gained this information reading research, especially some found in Developmental Psychology. I'm seeing these words more and more in research. My favorite article presented that the children of "synchronous" mothers had developed the regulation of emotion and impulsivity by the age of three, and that the children of "invasive" mothers had not. The "invasive" behaviors were the mothers trying to force their infant's attention to a bright object when the "synchronous" mothers waited for the infant to notice it and then reinforced the attention to the object. I'm hoping that there will be some discussion of this post in order to further clarity this important information.